Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Silly Season is over ..... Mostly!

Well Christmas is over for another year. Ordinarily I would keep the tree and decorations up until after New Years Day but this year hasn't been an ordinary one and the tree, decorations and everything are already gone, life is humdruming along as normal as can be expected again.
We spent Christmas Day out on my brother David's farm. The kids had a blast and I was happy to sit back and watch everyone doing the Christmas thing. Here are a few of my favourite photos of Christmas Day ..

I didn't take so many photos this year, but since Jason's death I haven't taken half as many photos as I used to over the year anyway.
December has been VERY difficult for me, and as resilient as my kids are they have noticed too.
Abbey a couple of days ago .."Mummy you always cry when you want our daddy to be here you always cry"
Broke my heart hearing her say that. But in a few days it will be a new year. I'm not saying anything about the new year going to be better and a new start etc etc because it is still going to be hard, and harder and there are many things regarding Jason that we still need to process through, more firsts as well as legal things regarding the nature of his death, but all I can say is it can't get any worse, and every day I am still here with our Beautiful Children is a good one.

So on New years Eve I will be raising my glass in honor of My sweet husbands memory, and not on moving forward, but in remembering, holding onto what we had and with that moving one foot infront of the other every day.

So until then Have a Safe and Happy New Year surrounded by the people you love!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Tracy i can relate to one percent of what you are going through!!! my parents seperated after a fight on christmas day and then a few years later my Nan died christmas eve!!! for years i thought what is the point!!!

since then the only way i have coped is to MAKE my own christmas..make it new...and all about fun and family (in which ever form they all come!!)

i hope over time this is a similar journey for you...
may your new years and the start of 2011 be a good one for you and your sweet family xxx mandyb